FICKLE IN DECISION-MAKING? IDENTIFY IT FROM YOUR HANDWRITING AND CHANGE IT WITH GRAPHOTHERAPY | Graphologist S.Sulianah | Grapholistic International

​Author: S.Sulianah (Graphologist and Founder of Grapholistic International)
Your Handwritings and Characters Analyst
www.grapholistic.com

Grapholistic Podcast Season 1 Episode 14 Transcript

If you are wondering, why am I including fickle-mindedness in the list of traits that could hinder your self-esteem and development, and how could it possibly influence your self-esteem?

Apart from the self-criticism trait that was highlighted in the earlier episode, the fickle-minded trait will make you questioned yourself and continuously changing your decisions.

It shows how you are not confident with your perspectives, opinions and even your own analysis. It tells you and of course the other people that you are working with or living with, that you have no idea why you had even made that decisions in the first place.

Furthermore, this trait will not only lower the perception you have towards yourself and diminish the confidence to make decision on your own, it will also affect your relationship with others.

When you constantly decide in an erratic way, it will be unpleasant and irritating to those people who are affected by your indecision. Gradually, you will create distrusts. Those people who you are dealing with will questioned not only your leadership, most importantly your credibility and reliability.

What could be the possible causes of someone being fickle-minded?

To begin with, being inconsistent and unsure when making decisions can happen when you have no idea what is going on. Or even if you do, you may not be sure about that subject or could be that you do not have any experiences dealing in that kind of situations. 

Because you were not sure, you might be  worried that “What if your decision could affect the entire team in a wrong way, or even tear apart the whole plan?”

Well, those worries are valid. Like for instance, your team is trying to save someone from drowning. The first step probably is to dive straight to the lake which you had instructed. But then suddenly someone saw an alligator. In this case, clearly you need to change the decision by probably getting a boat or rope instead of diving straight ahead to help. Changing decision like in this case is understandable. 

The kind of fickle decisions which could make you doubt yourself, or people to doubt your reliability is when you keep changing your 'final decisions' solely relying on others’ opinions.

For instance, you have decided with your team to fix those ceiling lights in your office. As usual, you had instructed your staff to source for suppliers and purchase those lights. Once you received the delivered items 2 weeks later, out of nowhere one of your friends who came to visit you in the office suggested you change the lights to bulb instead of LED. You decided to listen to your friend’s opinion even though you had spent hours deciding with your staff that LED is less costly for your office monthly electricity expenses.

You listened to a friend who was not involved in the decision-making and has no idea what is going on. The point is you rely on external inputs, wasting time and money. You did not even stop to think about it yourself. From your position you might not realized that your behavior is evident to your staff clearly showing how you are not confident with your own decisions and could easily be influenced. It is worst if this is not your first time. 

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I used to work with an owner of a company for over a decade who has this kind of decision-making process. It is understandable to change plans but doing it very often like 95% to 98% of the time shows how we could not rely on his decisions when it comes to serious matters. Not only that, it will and had also affected the credibility of the second person who is taking in his decisions and passing it to the other teams. ​

Because of the way he make decisions, employees do not trust him. They may look like they listened but in fact once they get out of the meeting, they let it go. It was not a surprise when employees could not handle it anymore that they decided to leave. Being fickle in small decisions for your personal one person situations may not affect anyone but if you are working in an organization, doesn’t matter whether you lead a team or not, the way you think, respond and when taking actions will impact you and other groups of people in a larger scale.

So, how can you make changes in the way you think?

1. First and foremost, change it by being aware of your behavior and understand the way you think. You must first observe and analyze the way you respond to the surrounding and in different situations. How you will usually think, behave and respond in circumstances like when you have more time to decide, and in urgency.
   
   
2. Then, learn to focus on the problem solving instead of relying on what if you don’t listen to them, and you might lose them as your friend if you don’t consider their opinions. Build your own backbone.
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3. If you have a boss or employee or even your partner who you think might have this character in them, you can check their handwriting slants.
   

How to check the handwriting for fickle or inconsistent thinking and decision-making?

1. In handwriting analysis, one of the handwriting traits that signifies inconsistent thinking like being fickle, you can observe that the handwriting will have variation in slants. Slants are the direction your letters are leaning to. Either left, right or upright. If the individual has inconstant decisions, their handwriting slants will be a mixture of two. The intensity will depend on the overall degree of slants and variations. 
   
   Also be careful if the person has three of this at one time in their handwriting. The person could be manipulative too. ​With reference to the previous example of an employer who I used to work with, he has two of slants mixed between left and upright most of the time. And sometimes the slants will be upright and towards the right. Yes, this could also signify someone who is flexible and in fact he was.
   
   However, if you have these traits you have to learn how and when to use it at the right place and at the right time. Because if not, the personality can turn to be an unpleasant behaviour not only to others but to your own disposition.
   
   
2. Other than that, you can also observe other traits that could possibly exists on the handwriting that signifies indecision. The variation in the size of the handwriting that is the height and or width or both of the middle zone. If it fluctuates intensively, it signifies that how he is not sure of himself. He might be okay now but, in a few minutes, he will not be.  
   
   For instance, you might notice that your employer will be so into not getting involved with the same client who has not been paying the project’s fees on-time to your company. Because of that your boss insisted he will not get involved with any new projects with them anymore. He will spend four hours talking to you about the client and how he will refuse their new project offer next time until they pay the outstanding. Then, two days later, your boss came to your room and tell you with excitement and pride that he just signed off a new agreement for a new project with the same client. Well, if this is how unpredictable your boss is, high possibility his handwriting sizes varies extremely. 
   
   
3. Another handwriting trait that will present in the person’s handwriting is low self-esteem. I had covered in earlier episode how to identify self-esteem on the handwriting. One of the low self-esteem trait is the placement of the t-bar which is below on the middle. T-bar is the horizontal line of your letter-t. If the person writes with a low t-bar, he is likely to be insecure about himself.
   
   High chances is he will doubt any of his decisions and tend to rely on others’ opinions. So, he will end up listening to someone else’s opinions instead of his especially if he has the desire to get approval from them mostly someone who sounds more authoritative.
   

What can you do if you have these handwriting traits?

1. As for variation in slants, learn to be conscious of how you write and the direction the slants is leaning to. If you tend to write upright, focus on upright. If right or left, do the same. Mixing slants slightly is okay but if too much, it will be too extreme and will definitely affect your behavior and the way you think. Be self-aware with the way you write.
2. This applies the same to the size of your handwriting. Be consistent. Not rigid just be consistent on your handwriting size.
3. As for your t-bar, write it above the middle zone. That is enough. The method of changing the handwriting is called Graphotherapy. It will take some time to noticed changes in your personality but definitely with the correct technique you will see the difference.

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Please remember that if you noticed these handwriting traits on your employer, employees or anyone, please do not immediately tell them to change their handwriting.

Throughout the years I have been in this field, I have never told anyone randomly to change their handwriting even though I had a chance to glance on theirs. You can use the information to learn about their characters and to confirm your own personal observations or use those analysis to adjust or adapt your own behavior towards them. Other than that, never ever advise them to change when they never asked you for your opinions and inputs.
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